Yesterday was orientation day where we went over the rules, layout and expectations. If I’m honest I was left scared and overwhelmed. There was so much poured onto us at once, and I was only seeing the hard work and the expenses.
Today I’ve calmed down and realized it’s not that bad. It’s true I don’t know what I’m doing. I also don’t like reading or messing with computer stuff. There was my brain adding up the cost of things, which turned out to not be so bad. Also I knew I was going to have to get a baby sitter, and I didn’t want to pay someone to keep my baby away from me. I have spent most of my daughters life with her, and I struggle with the thought of not seeing her for 7 hours.
As it ended up, I was worrying about things that didn’t matter. I get to wash clothes by hand. Groceries for Hope as snacks doesn’t cost very much. The baby sitter is less money than I expected, and I do get to see her at lunch, nights, weekends, and maybe keep her Tuesdays and Thursdays with me. It was foolish of me to get all worked up, because God cares about me.
I know so many things, but this time I let fear get the better of me. It was wrong and I should have never worried or doubted our importance in being here. God has a plan, and I need to hold onto and remember that. And there is no reason to fear, because God is with me.
When I was all worked up and feeling down, God told me not to worry, and to do something I enjoy. So I grabbed my notebook and headphones. Jesus picked out the song It’s Alright by Brandon Heath, and that spoke to me. I’ll let you listen to it, but it’s about Jesus calling the storm.
Here’s where I remind you to not Fear. Yes it’s hard and I messed up. But I realized again how wrong I was. Jesus is with you, so no matter the storm going on, you’re going to be okay. Don’t forget how you are a child of His, and He takes good care of His kids.
There is no Fear in Perfect Love, so trust you are very dearly Loved and be not afraid. I Love you, and I wrote this because I care about you. Living in fear is a terrible place to be, I’ve done it far too many times; letting fear hold me back or letting it control my decisions. It’s time for all of us to be free, because we’re children of God.